How To Break Up With An Alien Read online

  His lips met mine for a cold second. Then he disappeared in a blue beam of light just before my mom opened the door to check on me.

  Chapter 5

  "Alright, Alex, I think you are finally starting to get the hang of this barista thing." Simone smiled, washing her hands in the tiny metal sink next to the espresso machine. Simone was always washing her hands. I chalked it up to OCD or something.

  I shrugged, leaning up against the back of the pastry case. "If you can call only messing up half of people's orders instead of all of them as getting the barista thing, then I guess I am."

  "Yeah, but that means you are getting at least half of those orders right." Simone wiped her hands with a lime green dish rag and turned back toward me.

  I opened my mouth to say something else when the bell above the door rang. I turned to see a woman walking in, someone I had never seen before. Cuppa Java did have its regulars being that Winnebago was a small town, but since we were off the highway we got a lot of travelers as well.

  "Hello, what can I get for you today?" I said in the friendliest voice I could muster. The owner said she'd received a few complaints about the sarcasm in my voice. I tried to explain that my voice was normally sarcastic sounding, but for some reason that didn't go over too well. I decided to just bite the bullet and try to sound friendlier rather than lose my job.

  The woman looked out from under a mop of blond curly hair. "Well, hey there!" She smiled and plopped her oversized camouflage print bag on the counter.

  I tried to keep smiling, but the lady was definitely interesting. She wore a gray sweater that looked like it had tiny Pac-Mans running around it, even though it was at least eighty degrees outside.

  "Anything I can get started for you?"

  She squinted her eyes and looked up at the coffee board. "Yes, yes, yes, I will have a caramel latte."

  "Two percent or skim?"

  "Uh, skim," she breathed.

  "Do you want whip cream?"

  "What is with all the questions?" She put her hands on her hips and stared back at me, narrowing her deep set brown eyes.

  I heard Simone try to stifle a giggle behind me. She started making fewer drinks and hung back to make me do the work. I guess it was better for my training, and she did have the whole weird cleaning thing going on with washing her hands after making every drink.

  "Uh, just standard procedure for drink making," I squeaked. I dealt with a lot of crazy aliens over the summer, but crazy humans were a hard one for me to deal with.

  "Oh! Okay, then whipped cream! Lots!" She tossed her hands up in the air and laughed.

  "Alright, then." I turned my back toward her as Simone inched to my side and pretended to be looking for something under the counter. In reality, she just keeled over laughing.

  I poured the milk in the melting pot and placed it on the machine to steam. Then I pumped the espresso, letting it sink into the small metal pitcher. After the milk heated to one-hundred-and-seventy-degrees, I took the heat wand out of it and poured the milk and espresso in a foam cup, followed by two squirts of caramel syrup. After grabbing the whipped cream out of the fridge beneath the espresso machine, I squirted a dollop on top of the drink and placed a lid on top before handing it back to the lady.

  "Okay, that will be three-forty-nine." I smiled, pressing the button for latte on the register.

  She nodded and reached into her bag. She rummaged through it for awhile before she screeched out, "MEOW!"

  I jumped back, almost tripping over Simone until she hopped up.

  The lady stood there laughing with a giant cat wallet in her hand. "I just let the cat out of the bag!"

  "Oh, heh, funny." I tried my best to smile and placed a hand over my heart. It was beating like crazy.

  "Alex, I'm going to head to the back real quick." Simone tapped my shoulder, still trying to cover her laughter, and went behind the saloon doors to where we stocked all of our supplies. I knew she was just going back there so the lady wouldn't see her laughing, but it wasn't fair to leave me with cooky-mcoockyness.

  The lady pulled out a five and placed it in my hand, not letting go until I looked at her. "Scared you, didn’t I, Princess?" She winked.

  I took the five and put in the register, counting her change. It had to be a coincidence. She couldn't know who Ace or I was.

  She leaned in closer, her words a whisper. "The Martians told me you were working here and I didn't believe them, but I guess I was wrong. Hot diggity dog!" She clapped her hands.

  I looked back toward the stockroom, hoping Simone didn't hear her. Only a few people knew about me and Ace, and those were mainly classified people from Circe. I didn't want the word to get out that I was dating an alien.

  "Don't worry." She took a giant slurp of her latte, which would have probably burned a normal person. This lady was definitely an alien. "I won't tell a soul. Too many people out there that want your title."

  My title? Before I could ask the strange lady another question she left. I knew that was something I would have to ask Ace about later, whenever I would see him again, but for the moment I just wanted to go back to pretending to be normal. Pretending being the key word.

  Chapter 6

  Friday couldn't come soon enough. Mrs. Huff's boring lecture had me teetering on the brink of sleep. I constantly found myself almost falling of my chair and then jolting awake to catch myself before I fell. When the bell finally rang I couldn't get up fast enough.

  "Miss Bianchi?"

  Crap. She spotted me. Now I was going to get reamed for falling asleep in class. I walked toward the rickety podium, other students whispering as they passed me as they left the room.

  "Yes, Mrs. Huff?"

  She licked her overly dry lips and I tried not to cringe. She looked like a Pomeranian with its tongue hanging out of her tiny wrinkled face. Her thinning hair was even the same color as an old dog.

  "The Columbia recruiter visited with you last year, correct?" Her voice was feeble, like each word could be her last.

  "Uh, yeah that was me."

  Her knees creaked through her polyester pants as she shifted back and forth. "Will you be attending there next fall?"

  "Um, no, I actually applied and was accepted to Northern Arizona."

  "Oh, that's too bad."

  I turned to leave when her clammy hand slapped a piece of paper down on mine.

  "You have such a talent for writing. You shouldn't waste it."

  In my hand was a bright red A staring back up at me. I didn't look back up at Mrs. Huff as I took the paper and slowly left the room.

  ***

  Work was pretty slow for a Friday. We closed at seven, and the football game started at six, so we were pretty much dead. I was just happy not to have any more visits from any crazy aliens. I thought about asking Ace about what the lady had said, but it never seemed to be the right time. Besides she never showed up again and I was hoping not to have another encounter with an alien I didn't know again for awhile. I would just ask if I did happen to see another alien. Why waste the precious time we did have together anyway?

  And it wasn't like I got to see much of Ace for that matter. Between school, work, and piles of homework it seemed like I was always busy. When I did have free time Ace had his own alien duties. He still hadn't even answered if he would go with me to the Fall Ball, and I gave up hoping that he would come. Maybe keeping my normal human life wasn't that important to him.

  "You headed to the game tonight?" Simone asked, peering at me with her big doe eyes over the pastry case.

  I shook my head, sweeping the few crumbs that had gathered near the fireplace. "Naw, it's not really my thing."

  She nodded, walking out from behind the counter and placing a few bags of coffee on the display shelf. "I could have probably guessed that one."

  I snorted. "What gave it away? Is it my wealth of after-school activities or my undying school spirit?"

  "I think it was your love of the rugby team."

  I loo
ked up to see her smile. She was actually really pretty, despite all the hair and makeup. She had an old Hollywood glamour about her that was hidden by red hair and eyeliner.

  "You got me." I laughed.

  "Hey, you got plans tonight for after work?"

  I arched an eyebrow and looked up at her. "Me?"

  She turned her head to each side, and then focused back on me. "I don't see anyone else here."

  I shrugged. "Nothing, just going home. Maybe talk to Ace." If he wasn't busy again trying to save the planet from other aliens trying to hack other people's dating profiles. Not like I had much of a life other than waiting around for him lately anyway.

  "Oh, well I wouldn't want to interrupt plans with your boyfriend." She turned back toward the display shelf. "But I like to head over to this place downtown, grab a bite to eat and watch their open mic nights on Fridays if you want to come with."

  I couldn't remember the last time someone asked me to hang out. Usually I was the geek that was always home on a Friday night. I really had made plans to hang out with Ace, but he had also been the one to cancel them or show up really late. One night of me making him wait couldn't hurt either of us. Neither could me having a normal human night out.

  "Sure, I'd love to."

  Chapter 7

  Seven o'clock hit and Simone couldn't get out fast enough. The sun was barely setting and the small parking lot was lit in shades of pink and light orange, like a giant bowl of sherbet.

  I still couldn't believe that Simone wanted to hang out with me. This was a girl who had her own apartment, snappy comebacks, and was better at putting on makeup than even Jen. She was like the awesome older sister that I never had and a friend that finally wanted to go out of her way to hang out with me, instead of a boyfriend that was always too busy to make it on time to see me.

  "Is it alright if we take my car? I'll bring you back after."

  I nodded. Probably the coolest person I'd ever met wanted to hang out with me and there was no way I was going to make her ride in my POS car.

  Truth be told, I didn't think my mom would even let me go, but she couldn't be happier. Going on and on about how happy she was that I had a new friend and blah, blah, blah. I didn't bother texting Ace. I wasn't exactly mad at him, but I figured that he would understand. If he could always have something come up, then I could as well.

  "Whoa, this is your car?"

  Simone stopped at a sleek black Mercedes sedan. I'm pretty sure it was the same kind that British Prime Ministers drove with the tinted windows and glossy frame.

  She nodded, opening the door and sliding into the plush, leather interior. "A girl's gotta drive something."

  I slid into the other side to be overwhelmed with the scent of leather and spearmint. "Is this your parents' car?"

  "Ha." Simone turned on the engine, which purred to life barely making a noise like the pox always did, and pulled out of the parking lot. "I haven't seen my parents in awhile. I don't think they would even think of getting me a car, let alone one like this."

  I glanced over at Simone as she turned on her radio to a jazz station. Eighteen and she had her whole life ahead of her. No parents telling her what to do, a nice car, and no boyfriend to worry about, let alone an alien prince with a mother who hated human girls.

  "I left home when I turned seventeen and moved out to an apartment in Pecatonica a few months ago. I was just lucky Kathy hired me at Cuppa Java and I had enough money from my grandparents trust to live comfortably."

  It was like she read my mind, but I didn't say anything, just nodded. I wondered if she could read my mind. I'd seen enough weirdness to know that it was possible. So, I just started thinking of random disgusting things, like old meat left outside in the summer. But that didn't garnish a reaction and I realized that I was just being stupid. Hanging out with too many aliens can do that to a girl.

  "So, what's your story? What makes you tick?" Simone pulled the car onto highway 20 and headed for downtown Rockford.

  I blew a big puff of air. "Not much to say really. Just your average small-town girl. You know the whole divorced parents, long distance boyfriend, and longing to get the hell out of dodge story."

  "I hear you on that one." She laughed before turning down the radio."I try to get out, but I just can't stay away. Always dreamed of going to New York though, studying at one of those Ivy League schools or something."

  "Really?" I couldn't believe that I would have something in common with Simone. A girl so awesome had the same dreams as me.

  "Yeah." She smoothed a fallen strand of glossy red hair out of her eyes. "Not like I was ever smart enough to get into one, but it would be cool."

  "I always imagined that I would go to Columbia, live in a tiny studio in Brooklyn, and write stories for some tabloid until I hit it big and ended up on CNN." I laughed. "But it's just a stupid fantasy."

  "That doesn't sound stupid to me at all." She looked over at me. Her navy eyes looked black when they were lit only by the streetlights outside her window. I always wondered if she wore contacts because they were such an unnaturally dark blue, but I never wanted to ask out loud. "Why don't you do it?"

  I shook my head, staring down and picking at the coffee grounds stuck under my finger nails. "I've committed to Northern Arizona. They have a decent Public Relations program and I can probably get a job on my dad's base when I'm out."

  "Is that what you really want?"

  I thought for a moment. Was it? Ace always did say it would be great if we were in driving distance from each other, but there was no reason he couldn't just beam to New York when he wanted to see me.

  "Why even go there in the first place? Just apply to Columbia."

  I rolled the coffee grounds I'd picked from my nails back and forth in my fingertips. "It's not that simple. I took the internship last summer to put on my application, but then..."

  "Then what?" Simone interrupted. "You met some guy and decide to throw away your Ivy League dreams to be closer to him?"

  "No, it's not like that." Okay, maybe it was exactly like that, but I couldn't admit that.

  She raised her thin eyebrows. "If you can make it now long distance there is no reason you couldn't make it in college. And if he can't handle that, then he isn't worth your time."

  I had no response. The fact was she made sense. Ace did have the beaming technology to see me and I did have Circe to put on my Columbia application. Luckily we pulled in front of the downtown square before Simone could make any more points.

  Parts of downtown were still really rundown, but the city square was the mayor's major revival project. A long cobblestone street stood covered in an archway of lights with boutiques, bakeries, and trendy restaurants lining the path.

  "I don't get out here too much," I said as we stepped out of Simone's car and into the muggy night air.

  Simone tossed our aprons in the backseat, wrapped her hair in a low bun and headed down the cobblestone path. "I try and get out here when I can. I like it. It makes me feel like I'm everywhere and nowhere all at the same time."

  "How do you figure?" I adjusted my glasses as we headed toward an electric blue building. Several wrought iron tables sat outside with a few people sitting at them and drinking coffee, even though it had to still be at least eighty degrees out.

  "Well." She twirled, her wide-legged jeans skimming against the path while she stood up on her tippy toes. She landed back on her heels, facing me with a large smile on her lips. "We are in the middle of a city, but somehow we can go two blocks one way and hit cornfields, go two blocks the other way and see the projects." She took my wrist, pulling me toward the purple and blue stained glass door of the restaurant.

  "Then we get here and experience a blend of cultures that can only be described as everything and nothing."

  I smiled. I had no idea what Simone was saying, but somehow I understood every single word and couldn't wait to hear more.

  Chapter 8

  We sat at a small booth in the corner ne
ar the windows, so we could people watch as well. The seats were striped teal and orange on either side of a clear table on a granite slab. The walls were painted a deep purple with small brass colored chandeliers above every table and photographs of local Rockford landmarks lining the walls. A small stage sat directly to the left of us where a guy with a blue Mohawk played an old rock song on the guitar and failed at singing along to the music.

  "So, this is the kind of music you're into?" I chunked the ice in my glass with my straw. The glasses were actually mason jars filled with the fruitiest sweet tea I'd ever had.

  Simone almost spit her tea all over, but covered her mouth. She sucked in the liquid and tried containing her laughter. "Heck no, I just come here for the open mic entertainment."

  The Mohawk guy's voice squeaked as he tried to hit the high notes, and Simone and I burst into a fit of laughter. By the time we were able to catch our breath the waitress came by with our food. She rolled her eyes behind her thick-framed glasses, tossed back her rainbow hair, and walked away.

  "I hope she didn't spit in our food," I whispered.

  "Maybe it will add some extra flavor. Waitress spit has a distinct taste of cigarettes and old bubble gum." Simone laughed before taking a bite of her portabella burger.

  "I'm glad you're a connoisseur of waitress gastronomy." I laughed before stuffing a potato wedge in my mouth.

  Simone licked her lips and swallowed her bite. "A trained barista knows no bounds of the spit world."

  The Mohawk guy ended his set and a girl with long red dreadlocks and an acoustic guitar covered in Barbie stickers took the stage. She strummed a few chords and then started a smoky, whiskey-ridden rendition of a Joni Mitchell song.

  "I like this song," I mused and stuck another wedge in my mouth.